M.I.A.

Sorry I've been missing in action lately.  My six year old computer decided to kick the bucket last month so I had to wait almost three and a half weeks for my new one to arrive.  It set me back a pretty penny but it's one of those things that's (sadly) kind of hard to live without nowadays.

In other (more exciting) news, I put in my two weeks notice at work yesterday.  While I can't wait to be free of that place and the feelings I associate with it, it almost makes it harder to go in everyday and work until the 24th.  I'll be taking the last three days as PTO (making my final exit on the 20th) and laying myself by the pool on my self-declared 'mini-vacation' until I can get back on the schedule at the Rec center.  And I know that being by the pool will be much more enjoyable knowing I'm being paid for it.

I'm excited I took this stand for myself.  I'm a pretty practical person, and it was hard for me to make this decision without having something equal in terms of benefits and stability.  The Rec center can give me almost 40 hours a week for the summer between camps and teaching, but it won't be forever and there's no benefits.  But I'll find something.  I'll live.  And probably with a better quality of life than I've had for the last few months.

Lately I've been feeling really sad (like sad enough that just thinking about work nearly brought me to tears waiting in the doctor's office on Tuesday), and not up to par physically either (no relation to the doctor's visit).  But what got me down more than anything was my lack of a spiritual life.  Not being able to attend church regularly has been really hard for me, and that is certainly the part of my new schedule I'm looking forward to the most.  I'll admit though, I will miss getting off at 4:30 everyday as a guaranteed thing. 

Last night was really the first night I've felt like myself in a long time.  Bekah and Sandy and I went to the eighth grade graduation of some of the middle schoolers and it was wonderful.  There were lots of laughs and witty comments, and I felt like I was speaking up and holding my own in a way that I've missed lately.

I'm excited to see where this goes, and this re-introduction to my freedom is perfectly timed for summer adventures.  Cheers to change.

Transitions

Today was my first "official" day on the job, getting up before the sun (at least until daylight savings time begins/ends...I don't know which one makes the days last longer) and trying extra hard to adhere to my schedule.  Nothing terribly notable on the whole except the occasional "you people" calls and the cute old ladies who end my day on a good note.

After work I headed to St. John's for youth Sunday.  I missed going to COR for normal Sunday morning service, and having to work today makes it feel too much like a normal weekday for my liking.  Now I'm never going to know what day it is.  St. John's is more structured than COR and actually attending service instead of just helping with the youth is going to take some getting used to.  Lots of ups and downs and repeating together.  But we are able to take communion every week and I'm pretty sure that is one of, if not my absolute favorite, part of church.  There's something about people approaching the same table, treated the same regardless of age, race, or station in life, standing with open hands, expectantly waiting to receive. 

Youth Sunday was so good and I was so proud.  All the youth groups participated by cooking the meal, leading the songs, even giving the main talk.  Instead of having traditional youth group this evening we had a "congregational conversation," where youth and adults sat in groups and discussed questions that had been submitted at last years meeting.  It was impressive (as always) getting to hear the kids thoughts on things.  Watching the kids step up and take leadership roles makes me super happy.  I did get asked, however, by one of the older ladies after the service if I was a mom of one of the kids - I hope I don't look that old.

Another day of work tomorrow followed by grocery shopping, checkbook balancing and ballet teaching.  Stoked about Tuesday, my first day off in over a week.  But for now I'm off to enjoy a half hour of Forrest Gump before crashing at my new old lady bedtime of 10pm.  I'm awesome.

Middle school thoughts

Today has been a crazy day, even though my calendar normally says "day off".  I taught Sunday school, hosted a chat session with Em and a mutual friend, prepped my ballet lesson for tomorrow, and led at a middle school youth group.  But this post isn't supposed to be me whining about my busy day; rather, I wanted to take a moment to comment on the intellegence and insight of kids (something I think we miss a good bit of the time).

The project and talking points for last week's youth group included making a bouncy ball out of 6 household ingredients and touching on the miracle of creation.  The kids were able to compare the balls, made with only a few ingredients, to people, who are made with hundreds of "ingredients" and are infinitely more complex.  Tonight, we made valentines for the Rescue Mission (one of the leaders is going to speak tomorrow evening and will take them with her).  All throughout the project I was trying to come up with an easily understandable way to connect creation and the making of valentines.  Here are some of the thoughts the kids shared:

"We created the cards."
"We were created out of love, just like we created the valentines out of love."
"We all used the same paper, glue, and glitter but none of our valentines look the same."
"We are giving love like the love God gives to us."

Wow.  I just love these kids and I'm amazed (pretty much weekly) at their depth and insight into the world.  I was even more touched that when we prayed together, so many of the kids prayed for the people that would get their cards tomorrow.  I don't recall being that aware of the rest of the world at that age.  I think I often forget that in an age run by computers and cell phones, where countless hours are spent in front of a screen, that kids have a lot more to say than we give them the time or space to express. 

Let's not discount this generation - they have a lot more to say than we realize.